Bidlarnmit is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, effective skunk.

Bidlarnmit created everything that exists two million years ago.

If you believe in Bidlarnmit, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Bidlarnmit, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Bidlarnmit's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Bidlarnmit's Holy Commandments

1. Learn three new languages a year.

2. Do not kill capybaras.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Fast once a month.

5. You must love Bidlarnmit.