Matquafdoss is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, amazing frog.

Matquafdoss created carbon seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Matquafdoss, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Matquafdoss, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Matquafdoss' most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Matquafdoss' Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Never paint your feet cyan.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Never hurt hamsters.

5. Always help sick geese.