Bestzimgen is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, happy unicorn.

Bestzimgen created everything that exists eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bestzimgen, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Bestzimgen, she will remove you from existence.

Bestzimgen's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Bestzimgen's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about solid mechanics.

2. Bestzimgen loves shrews, so they must be respected.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Bestzimgen on top of all buildings.