Fomgarfid is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, tranquil mongoose.

Fomgarfid created Africa two billion years ago.

If you believe in Fomgarfid, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Fomgarfid, it will remove you from existence.

Fomgarfid's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Fomgarfid's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about asteroids.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Fomgarfid.

3. Erect a giant fawn sculpture of Fomgarfid in the centre of the settlement.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Learn seven new languages a year.