Dankabbum is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, irritating alligator.

Dankabbum created energy two years ago.

If you believe in Dankabbum, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dankabbum, she will have a low opinion of you.

Dankabbum's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Dankabbum's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not wear platinum on your body.

3. Do not take Dankabbum's name in vain.

4. Dankabbum loves capybaras, so they must be respected.

5. Always treat manatees with great respect.