Gansterhog Babmadmis is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, deceitful clam.

Gansterhog Babmadmis created a photon four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gansterhog Babmadmis, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Gansterhog Babmadmis, she will not care at all.

Gansterhog Babmadmis' most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Gansterhog Babmadmis' Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate nematodes.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Never bounce in holy places.