Metdumtannell is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, clever newt.

Metdumtannell created gold five million years ago.

If you believe in Metdumtannell, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Metdumtannell, she will think nothing of it.

Metdumtannell's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Metdumtannell's Holy Commandments

1. Always help squirrels in need.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate badgers.

3. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

4. Do not speak about strawberries.

5. Never think about electromagnetism near tortoises while wearing violet shorts and balancing four zinc spheres on your arms.