Betnadtinfod is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, overgenerous human.

Betnadtinfod created the cosmos three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Betnadtinfod, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Betnadtinfod, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Betnadtinfod's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Betnadtinfod's Holy Commandments

1. Erect six platinum sculptures of Betnadtinfod on top of important buildings.

2. Never talk about squirrels.

3. Always help tortoises in need.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never talk about fluid mechanics near great tits while wearing red jumpers and balancing eight silicon spheres on your feet.