Omintonsanbuscarbim is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, witty spider.

Omintonsanbuscarbim created the Whirlpool Galaxy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Omintonsanbuscarbim, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Omintonsanbuscarbim, he will throw large rocks at you.

Omintonsanbuscarbim's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Omintonsanbuscarbim's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never feed beans to dogs while wearing turquoise rings.

3. Never mention sheep.

4. Hide if three ants approach from the south.

5. Do not listen to music.