Nurlbopbam is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, bad-tempered warg.

Nurlbopbam created tapeworms nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Nurlbopbam, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Nurlbopbam, he will turn you into a mole.

Nurlbopbam's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Nurlbopbam's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about ultrasonics near moths while wearing yellow coats and balancing five gold spheres on your back.

2. Always help goats in need.

3. Always make sure there are no shrews in a room before entering it.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never mention nematodes.