Jonhivgov is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, pitiless naga.

Jonhivgov created the Milkyway two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jonhivgov, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Jonhivgov, it will turn you into a dog.

Jonhivgov's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Jonhivgov's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed spinach to snails while wearing white corsets.

2. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

3. Never talk about nebulae.

4. Do not kill rats.

5. Do not covet oxen.