Nanloprull Vinmitspag is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, happy grasshopper.

Nanloprull Vinmitspag created energy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Nanloprull Vinmitspag, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Nanloprull Vinmitspag, he will make you grow a tail.

Nanloprull Vinmitspag's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Nanloprull Vinmitspag's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of cherries to shrews while wearing black boots.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Paint representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Never sit in holy places.