Stafzakmum is a god.
It takes the form of an extremely thin, bad-tempered
yak.
Stafzakmum created tapeworms three trillion years ago.
If you believe in
Stafzakmum, it will give you a free planet.
If you do not believe in
Stafzakmum, it will turn you into a dog.
Stafzakmum's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.
Stafzakmum's Holy Commandments1. Do not commit murder.
2. Learn six new languages a year.
3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.
4. You must pray to Stafzakmum eight times a day.
5. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.