Rutpognig Kemfidsan is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, contented donkey.

Rutpognig Kemfidsan created the Sun five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rutpognig Kemfidsan, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Rutpognig Kemfidsan, she will turn you into a dog.

Rutpognig Kemfidsan's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Rutpognig Kemfidsan's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Rutpognig Kemfidsan on top of all buildings.

2. You must never eat bread.

3. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.