Homtimlin is a god.

It takes the form of a large, omnipotent jaguar.

Homtimlin created a charm quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Homtimlin, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Homtimlin, it will be very sad.

Homtimlin's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Homtimlin's Holy Commandments

1. Homtimlin must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Never think about solid mechanics near snails while wearing indigo shorts and balancing five lead spheres on your neck.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not kill dolphins.