Vilsadfom is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, wise wolf.

Vilsadfom created viruses eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vilsadfom, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Vilsadfom, it will laugh at you.

Vilsadfom's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Vilsadfom's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Never talk about thermodynamics.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Do not wear titanium on your body.

5. Do not speak about figs.