Padmotcep is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, egotistical hydra.

Padmotcep created Africa five million years ago.

If you believe in Padmotcep, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Padmotcep, he will be very sad.

Padmotcep's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Padmotcep's Holy Commandments

1. Padmotcep loves aardvarks, so they must be honoured.

2. Always look after injured moths.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Always wear violet.

5. Put Padmotcep first in all things.