Gamtofveen is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, omnipotent whale.

Gamtofveen created everything that exists two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gamtofveen, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Gamtofveen, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Gamtofveen's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Gamtofveen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat beans.

2. Retreat if six eagles approach from the north.

3. Erect a giant pink sculpture of Gamtofveen in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never wear tights.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.