Budomtzen is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, contented scorpion.

Budomtzen created carbon two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Budomtzen, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Budomtzen, she will make you grow a tail.

Budomtzen's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Budomtzen's Holy Commandments

1. Snails are not to be trusted.

2. Always wear red.

3. Do not keep five bats in a large pit.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never think about solid mechanics near capybaras while wearing indigo boots and balancing seven lead spheres on your hands.