Begkangut is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, pitiless troll.

Begkangut created life three billion years ago.

If you believe in Begkangut, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Begkangut, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Begkangut's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Begkangut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear platinum on your body.

2. Never think about asteroids.

3. Never feed lots of strawberries to eagles while wearing orange shirts.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Do not stand on grass.