Venfodcamtof Pomdapcen is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, merciful shark.

Venfodcamtof Pomdapcen created the solar system two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Venfodcamtof Pomdapcen, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Venfodcamtof Pomdapcen, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Venfodcamtof Pomdapcen's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Venfodcamtof Pomdapcen's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh near manatees.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Never run in holy places.

4. Never eat turnips.

5. Erect a giant tin sculpture of Venfodcamtof Pomdapcen in the centre of the settlement.