Batpodhunlin is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, fast manatee.

Batpodhunlin created the planet Saturn seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Batpodhunlin, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Batpodhunlin, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Batpodhunlin's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Batpodhunlin's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Retreat if five goats approach from the east.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. You must pray to Batpodhunlin nine times a day.