Yamtalxuck Wontitwip Nullsakhat is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, emotional bird.

Yamtalxuck Wontitwip Nullsakhat created humanity five million years ago.

If you believe in Yamtalxuck Wontitwip Nullsakhat, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Yamtalxuck Wontitwip Nullsakhat, she will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Yamtalxuck Wontitwip Nullsakhat's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Yamtalxuck Wontitwip Nullsakhat's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about special relativity near horses while wearing yellow jumpers and balancing five lead spheres on your head.

2. Never talk about eukaryotes.

3. Yamtalxuck Wontitwip Nullsakhat loves geese, so they must be respected.

4. You must love Yamtalxuck Wontitwip Nullsakhat.

5. Never talk about quantum gravity.