Ratbugflap is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, calm mole.

Ratbugflap created Asia six billion years ago.

If you believe in Ratbugflap, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Ratbugflap, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Ratbugflap's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Ratbugflap's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about archaea.

2. Ratbugflap loves manatees, so they must be honoured.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never eat bark.