Gembepxuck is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, humane ant.

Gembepxuck created an electron three billion years ago.

If you believe in Gembepxuck, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Gembepxuck, it will not care at all.

Gembepxuck's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Gembepxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat parsnips.

2. Do not shave your arms.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never think about moons.

5. Never talk about thermodynamics near otters while wearing blue trousers and balancing eight zinc spheres on your legs.