Hapdotyim is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, omniscient crab.

Hapdotyim created a photon eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hapdotyim, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Hapdotyim, she will destroy your home galaxy.

Hapdotyim's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Hapdotyim's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about quantum field theory.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Do not wear lead on your body.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Hapdotyim.