Stafmigpangtom is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, unjust lion.

Stafmigpangtom created parasitic wasps eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Stafmigpangtom, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Stafmigpangtom, he will turn you into a slug.

Stafmigpangtom's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Stafmigpangtom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Do not shave your head.

4. Draw representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Never eat bark.