Rulkadarf is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, self-confident snake.

Rulkadarf created water nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rulkadarf, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Rulkadarf, it will destroy your home solar system.

Rulkadarf's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Rulkadarf's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum gravity near dogs while wearing black scarves and balancing four zinc spheres on your chest.

2. Do not wear yellow clothing.

3. Never mention doves.

4. Never feed beans to hamsters while wearing boots.

5. Do not trade with those who eat pineapples.