Canlop is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, ruthless goat.

Canlop created snails three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Canlop, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Canlop, he will turn you into a worm.

Canlop's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Canlop's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh in the presence of rats.

2. Do not trade with those who eat nuts.

3. Never think about cell theory.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Always make sure there are no shrews in a room before entering it.