Gantaryim is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, witty naga.

Gantaryim created the Andromeda Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gantaryim, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Gantaryim, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Gantaryim's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Gantaryim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Gantaryim's name in vain.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Never jump in holy places.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Learn five new languages a year.