Gedsternig is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, prudent fairy.

Gedsternig created dark energy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gedsternig, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Gedsternig, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Gedsternig's most sacred site is Yerakini in Greece.

Gedsternig's Holy Commandments

1. Learn eight new languages a year.

2. Never go into turquoise rooms.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Hide if four geese approach from the south.

5. Worship no other gods but Gedsternig.