Hatcissmut is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, kind octopus.

Hatcissmut created the Cigar Galaxy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hatcissmut, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Hatcissmut, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Hatcissmut's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Hatcissmut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat wheat.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place in purple.

4. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Hatcissmut.