Bemcennul is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, self-confident faun.

Bemcennul created a quark five million years ago.

If you believe in Bemcennul, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Bemcennul, she will send you a sign.

Bemcennul's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Bemcennul's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention seals.

2. Do not wear lead on your body.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near ducks while wearing purple skirts.

4. Do not keep three ants in a large pit.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.