Haslinbeghadstanvabyim is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, humorless raven.

Haslinbeghadstanvabyim created matter two million years ago.

If you believe in Haslinbeghadstanvabyim, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Haslinbeghadstanvabyim, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Haslinbeghadstanvabyim's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Haslinbeghadstanvabyim's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat wheat.

2. Badgers are not to be trusted.

3. Always obey Haslinbeghadstanvabyim's priests.

4. Erect seven carbon sculptures of Haslinbeghadstanvabyim on top of important buildings.

5. You must love Haslinbeghadstanvabyim.