Xincapnat is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, unsympathetic frog.

Xincapnat created bats six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xincapnat, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Xincapnat, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Xincapnat's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Xincapnat's Holy Commandments

1. Never leap in holy places.

2. Never mention whales.

3. Feed all hungry foxes.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Never talk about ribonucleic acid.