Hatvanxin is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, almighty whale.

Hatvanxin created silver eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hatvanxin, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Hatvanxin, it will turn you into a sheep.

Hatvanxin's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Hatvanxin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Otters are not to be trusted.

3. Never wear rings.

4. Hide if three moths approach from the east.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Hatvanxin.