Lanmatvan Veenbumdib is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, competent jellyfish.

Lanmatvan Veenbumdib created the Virgo Supercluster eight million years ago.

If you believe in Lanmatvan Veenbumdib, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Lanmatvan Veenbumdib, she will turn you into a mouse.

Lanmatvan Veenbumdib's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Lanmatvan Veenbumdib's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Retreat if five mice approach from the east.

4. Do not eat aubergines.

5. Always make sure there are no mites in a building before entering it.