Flapvegyam is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, strong cow.

Flapvegyam created a strange quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flapvegyam, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Flapvegyam, she will turn you into a tree.

Flapvegyam's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Flapvegyam's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about nebulae.

2. Never wear shoes.

3. Erect a giant orange sculpture of Flapvegyam in the centre of the settlement.

4. Erect seven silver sculptures of Flapvegyam on top of important buildings.

5. Mice are unholy and should not be approached.