Sagbossnellunlatmispitstaf Hapbigmig is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, cheerful camel.

Sagbossnellunlatmispitstaf Hapbigmig created the planet Saturn nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sagbossnellunlatmispitstaf Hapbigmig, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Sagbossnellunlatmispitstaf Hapbigmig, he will torture you forever.

Sagbossnellunlatmispitstaf Hapbigmig's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Sagbossnellunlatmispitstaf Hapbigmig's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if nine bats approach from the west.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Do not leap in public.

4. Do not wear magenta clothing.

5. Never talk about snails.