Ragbestlen is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, annoying monkey.

Ragbestlen created vertebrates two million years ago.

If you believe in Ragbestlen, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Ragbestlen, she will jump up and down on your head.

Ragbestlen's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Ragbestlen's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about dark energy.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never eat lentils.

4. Put Ragbestlen first in all things.

5. Do not speak about cherries.