Cudxuckpon is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, merciful mole.

Cudxuckpon created the cosmos two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cudxuckpon, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Cudxuckpon, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Cudxuckpon's most sacred site is Cusihuiriachi in Mexico.

Cudxuckpon's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Cudxuckpon.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Hide if eight voles approach from the east.

4. Do not kill eagles.

5. Pray towards the south.