Nibkemwee is a god.

She takes the form of a small, uncaring lobster.

Nibkemwee created a Higgs boson five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nibkemwee, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Nibkemwee, she will try to impress you with trees.

Nibkemwee's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Nibkemwee's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear rings.

2. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

3. Never feed bananas to eagles while wearing skirts.

4. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a room before entering it.

5. Never chant in holy places.