Gubvinwit is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, quiet finch.

Gubvinwit created time and space two million years ago.

If you believe in Gubvinwit, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Gubvinwit, he will laugh at you.

Gubvinwit's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Gubvinwit's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Gubvinwit on top of all buildings.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Gubvinwit.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Gubvinwit.