Bafhubstaf is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, unthinking fly.

Bafhubstaf created tapeworms seven million years ago.

If you believe in Bafhubstaf, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Bafhubstaf, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Bafhubstaf's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Bafhubstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear aluminium on your body.

2. Mice are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Feed all hungry nematodes.

4. You must pray to Bafhubstaf four times a day.

5. You must love Bafhubstaf.