Sisquagtar is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, capable owl.

Sisquagtar created the solar system five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sisquagtar, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Sisquagtar, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Sisquagtar's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Sisquagtar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Do not wear aluminium on your body.

4. Put Sisquagtar first in all things.

5. Erect three nickel sculptures of Sisquagtar on top of important buildings.