Teencatyog is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, cheerful duck.

Teencatyog created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Teencatyog, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Teencatyog, she will turn you into a plant.

Teencatyog's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Teencatyog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear cyan clothing.

2. Teencatyog loves sharks, so they must be honoured.

3. Erect a giant silicon sculpture of Teencatyog in the centre of the settlement.

4. You must pray to Teencatyog eight times a day.

5. Never feed lots of apples to manatees while wearing pink hats.