Pinyokyat is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, stupid rat.

Pinyokyat created a down quark three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pinyokyat, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Pinyokyat, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Pinyokyat's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Pinyokyat's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Pinyokyat.

2. Do not keep five frogs in a large pit.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate swans.