Kanbogbun is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, dishonourable narwhal.

Kanbogbun created the Black Eye Galaxy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kanbogbun, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Kanbogbun, he will turn you into a plant.

Kanbogbun's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Kanbogbun's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about bacteria.

2. Never write about ultrasonics.

3. Never paint your arms black.

4. Never talk about moons.

5. Never hurt dolphins.