Yarpdunbin is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, cheerful giraffe.

Yarpdunbin created tapeworms six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yarpdunbin, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Yarpdunbin, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Yarpdunbin's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Yarpdunbin's Holy Commandments

1. Learn seven new languages a year.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Never talk about ants.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.