Baflikhud is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, pitiless bird.

Baflikhud created dark energy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Baflikhud, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Baflikhud, she will send you a sign.

Baflikhud's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Baflikhud's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum mechanics near monkeys while wearing cyan coats.

2. Never hop near mice.

3. Retreat if five great tits approach from the west.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.